Girl whose chin looks like a penis

I often write down stories (particularly when I'm drinking) so I can remember them later. I discovered one there saying "Girl whose chin looks like a penis" but have no memory or writing it and no idea what I was talking about.

Dodgeball

They're showing Extreme Dodgeball on cable tv here. One of the players is named (or nicknamed Salmon Rope). The commentator pulled out the line "Great dodge by Salmon Rope. He really ran upstream with that one."

Weird

I wonder if I'll get weirder or more normal as I get older. I reckon I've got less weird over the last five years but the trend could reverse itself.

Letters to the editor

I usually try not to read letters to the editor in newspapers cos they piss me off too much but I'm glad I read this one. This is one of the lamest things I've ever read.

"This is clearly a time for applying unconventional ideas to the transport network. If we can get Londoners talking on the Tubes and buses, I predict our fears would be reduced by the community feeling - and the chances of deterring an attack would be increased.
My idea is to supply high visibility 'Volunteer Bag Check' jackets to commuters, who would invite other commuters on the network to open their bags. This would get people chatting. People who don't want to open their bags wouldn't be under any suspicion but others would note that they hadn't entered into the spirit of things. The jackets would be passed on and could be sponsored by businesses taking a 'vested' interested in getting their staff to work"

Christmas in July

I know it's pedantic (and probably not very interesting) but I've always thought Christmas in July was a stupid idea. If you're trying to have a Christmas in the Australian winter then why not have it 6 months from Christmas (on the 25th of June)? Why the 25th of July? Why not some other arbitrary date?

Men Behaving Badly

It's funny watching Men Behaving Badly and actually recognising the brand of beer they're drinking.

But I can't believe I've just realised that they have Men Behaving Badly on here on the that the last episode is on. Back to crap tv.

Punter

I went up to Cambridge a couple of days ago to watch the cricket with DrLove and some of his mates. Afterwards we went punting and got to see all the colleges from the river. I thought that it didn't look too hard but I thought wrong because I fell in soon after I started having a go at propelling us (don't know what the word is). Thankfully I'd given DrLove my phone and wallet to hold. And thankfully my Armani sunnies didn't fall off my head.

Liam reckoned the best part of it was that I came up with my aussie flat (which I'd been wearing as a cape) wrapped around my head.

It's not Don Bradman

In response to a fielding change the commentators just said "It's Glen McGrath batting not Don Bradman." Then the next ball he hit a four.

British TV

British TV really is remarkably bad. It's amazing that a country that has produced so many good tv shows can't provide decent things to watch.

Direct

After talking to me for a couple of hours a German guy I met travelling turned to another guy and said "I think Australians are very direct." I wonder if I'm a great example of the directness of Australians.

Funniest Home Videos

It really bothers me how many people like Funniest Home Videos style shows. It's bloody ridiculous. They're such stupid shows. You should hear my flatmates squealing while watching.

Red Dwarf

I watched the second episode of red dwarf today and was pleasantly surprised to be reminded of the following interchange:

RIMMER: Lister, it *has* happened. You can't change it, any more than
you can change what you had for breakfast yesterday.
LISTER: Hey, it hasn't happened, has it? It has "will have going to have
happened" happened, but it hasn't actually "happened" happened yet,
actually.
RIMMER: Poppycock! It will be happened; it shall be going to be
happening; it will be was an event that could will have been taken
place in the future.

Drop Bears

I've started telling people about drop-bears. Noone disagrees with me.

Muff Diving Centre

There's a town in Ireland called Muff and in that town is the Muff Diving Centre. I'm not joking.

Golf Carts

I saw police driving round in a police golf cart in Warsaw.

London

It was quite difficult to work out what was going on in London by watching Polish tv in a train station yesterday. Even when Tony Blair gave his speech I still couldn't understand because they translated it to Polish.

I love latvia

I've never seen girls as beautiful as those in the club I went to in Riga in Latvia last night. It was incredible. They were all Russian.